Friday, November 19, 2010

久違的快樂與童言

小孩就是這麼地天真快樂。
看著我剛認識的三位小朋友,
讓我從心裡的流露出久違地放開
的笑容。我真慶幸昨日跟著朋友
們直殺到北海,就為了吃東炎面。
一輪不足,再轉下一站,真的飽了。
幾乎要嘔了……就在這裡認識了
這三位不怕生的小男孩。

可愛的樣子真的讓我很難不“為之傾倒”。
就在盪著千秋的我,認識了老二,偉,十歲吧,
挑撥我盪的千秋太矮了。童心未眠的我,
動起真格,一老一少還真是一下一上的衝上
千秋的最高點。朋友都在一旁呼我別教壞小孩子。
讓我好不委屈的直呼“是他先挑撥我的嘢~”

三個興奮的小孩帶著他們養的兩隻小狗,
吸引了我們一群擁上去。就這樣的我認識了
三個小孩,偉,定和盛。盛是最小的,樣子
最好看,以後一定很俊秀,老纏我,
朋友說我被人放電。偉,第二,厲害“社交”
吧,跟著我們幾個都是有話直說。定,第三,
最有禮貌吧,說話很有分寸。

看著他們,我笑了,每一刻都不想停止我的笑容,
很自然,很舒心。他們讓我更加地覺得大學裡
真的有太多太多的博克臉,必要的,卻是
讓我不適應。三個小瓜,有話直說,不想太多,
就算不說,循循善誘下,還是從實招來,讓我也
樂得不亦樂乎。每句話都是這麼地真誠又天真。

讓我不禁懷念消逝的童年,難道真的只有童言無忌嗎?
有人說,童言無忌是天真,長大了還抱有有話直說的
態度,是傻瓜、白痴。是真的,雖然我不厭惡別人
有話直說,可是別人總是難以接受實話,所以不說話。
是我最好的對策。

三個小瓜對著我們說,你追我們啦!我太飽了,
我真的很怕我會追到嘔。可是我真的太久沒有
玩“追追”了,被他們追著跑的時候,我的笑聲
又再開砲了,遊樂場都是我的笑聲。三個人來來回回
地都動不到我,更是讓我爆笑。玩累了,坐下來,
休息吧,三個小孩又再圍了過來,朋友們嘴上
直說小孩子不可以撒謊,可是自己的每一句話都是
胡言,他們更是信以為真。

聊啊聊啊……我們竟然待到凌晨十二點才不捨得的跟
他們說掰掰,趕回大學。這一晚我睡得很好,
真的很感謝這三個小朋友讓我這麼開心的笑。
真的希望還有機會再看到他們。

珍惜你們的童年吧。 =)


說到笑,還有一個人讓我也笑得很自然很舒心,
可是這位老闆太忙了,不知幾時才能再見面呢。

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Maybe I am Stingy

Recently, I've got a feedback from a she-so-called
good friend of hers, "Don't be so kiam siap (stingy)"
The truth is... I'm stingy.

How stingy I am? I go for mamak instead of
some classy shop. I go into franchise fast food
like once in a month. I go for stock up once a month.
I called you to see if you could join us. I volunteer to
ride out and be your company when you wanted to
buy a guitar.. Spent my time(gold) to comfort you
when you are down....

Whoa... I'm so stingy.....
I totally accept that you said that I was rude
because I hung you up, but with a "stingy".
You are so right... I'm so stingy...

And I guess I'm not trustworthy as well...
A good friend of mine is actually from time to
time checking on me whether or not I am
hanging out with his ex... hahaha... So Ironic!
He is my buddy... BUDDY...

Now I realized that, all of these so-called
buddy or good friends, aren't any close
to the actual meaning of the term....

I think I would have to buy a new dictionary then.
Or Should I write myself a dictionary?
I will define stingy, good friends and buddy for my life.
Anyway, I can only speak here. Why? Because none of
them would actually see or read this... Like I said
Nobody can handle the truth... If I confront them, in the
end, it would be like a declaring war... Why not
I just humor them by just swallow down my words
and shout here...

All is well.. All is well... D, I really need your piece of mind.
What should I do in order to catch up with you? You
are always good in this, aren't you? I miss you...

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

People just can't handle joke and truth

How well can you handle the truth or a joke?
If there is a measurement, I think I will have a
grade 8 out of 10. Hmm... Am I over estimated
myself? I don't know...

Sometimes I am really down, but I keep telling
people that "I believe I have high EQ."
This is kinda lame, I know... Hard to believe too.
But it is true, no matter what you said about me,
I could just laugh it off or look away without a hiss.

Maybe misery is my company for such a long time.
Therefore, mean word or sarcasm is not really
that penetrative. Great! Somehow it makes me think
that people could have just handle irony or the truth
just like me. The truth is, a lot (all) of them are not...

I'm well known with my penetrative words, still I couldn't
help to speak them out under these conditions:
a) Seeing people being hissed by some asshole
b) Someone has over rated his or her value to this world
c) When I see ugly(vague) people
d) When I'm having mood swing
And of course these are all because of my arrogant.

Don't ask me to elaborate the ugly, it could be in
so many ways.. You should figure it out... The very simplest
explanation would be anyone will annoy you by just pass
by in front of you. That would be called as ugly... =)

Ok ok... I know this is bad. So I really wanna quit it.
The other day I was chatting with my good friend in
aimst, I told him to shut me up when I am trying to
being arrogant or ego. How did he earn that authority?
Well, he is my good friend as I mentioned, I taught him to be
harsh when he wants to criticize people (and he is really
good in this, far more better than me), and he knew
how to control as well.

The next day, he had an issue with me already.
Well, I guess nobody can actually shut me up
already. What was the issue? I nominated him
as my batch representative, of course I was just
joking, but he just took it so seriously. The moment I shouted
out his name, his face turned EMO!

Though I heard he has no more issue with me already.
But he kept avoiding me. Well, I guess I deserve it...
And this has turned into an inside joke as well...
Every one keeps using "don't play(fool) me lor, I will emo de lo"
"Owh.. Now you like this lar.. I emo de lo"
"You don't touch me lor... I emo de lo"
and blah blah blah... Everything must has to do with EMO.

I don't know whether or not this emo good friend
can handle this joke. Though the starting of this emo-
sentence is because of him, now every one is using
it as a joke...

So, here is a piece of my experience, nobody can
handle joke or sarcasm well... Unless they are high
in EQ. If not you will have to bear with the consequences.

Don't speak before you "filter" the content for at
least 30 seconds and don't forget to give compliment.
You know, people are mortal, nobody likes bitter(sarcasm)
over sweet(compliment). I have this obligate truth mode,
so I tried not to lie. Then how could I compliment people?
Compliment those goods they have... Settled!

Seriously, sometimes it's better to tell a lie than
telling the truth. It's true... Of course I gave a lot
of compliments that are not true... Who cares?
Because people will just turn emo after hearing the truth.
Please~

So, please thinks 30 seconds before you speak if not
I will emo then... Muahahaha....!!

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Origami Origami~

So strange that we were discussed about
origami online!! This is gay, man!! Hahaha!
Someone had been complaining about his
poor skill in origami... Then here we started
our little conversation...

He complained that, two holes were found
underneath his.... *Ops.. this sounds erotic*
For some reason, he proposed a tulip with
two holes at the bottom.... Luckily he gets
it right at the end.. If not.. hiak hiak...
I will laugh right into your face... xD

Upon his request, he wanted me to show
him the tulip I made... which is sort of
like a Down's Syndrome Origami.. Fat
and fluffy one.. Whatever~ Cuz it's not a
competition...



Because I think my tulip is so
freak and retarded, I think that I should
make something prettier(I'm more familiar with)
*I've taken all the advantage here.. smirk*
And I sent my final product to him...
Seriously! I don't know what kinda flower is this...
I'm not really into the plant, just the origami.


And I told him that I know an origami that
can float on water for some time.. I think I should
show it to him, here it goes....





At the end, he beats me. With his tulip!!!
(I'm so sorry I cannot upload his photo, because it will violate his privacy)
OMG~ sobbing~ *slap!* Suck it up..!!

Conclusion: This conversation is a bit weird, this blog is weird, the photos are weird. The overall is creepy... I shouldn't do this again... EVER!!

Time to Grow Up!!

I think my friend like to quote "it's not easy to be me".
I think it's not really easy to be him, that's why I can't use that quote.
But I would like to quote this "it is not possible to be someone else"
Less arrogant, I guess... =)

Anyway, I totally agree with that everyone in this world
is unique. Maybe somewhere around this world, there is
somebody like you, but he or she would never be you.

But I can assure you, it is easy to be me. Why?
You just need to embrace my beliefs, then you will behave like me.
I'm arrogant, ego, stubborn, always cross the line, believe in
nobody except my mum, emotional, reckless and plain honest.
How honest it is? If I see through the flaw in you, I will shout it right into
your face and leave you no pride in front of your friends.
My friends would like to say there is a knife(s) in my words.

To be frank, I rather nobody in this world would be like me.
Because what I've been doing is wrong, I hurt a lot of people.
Especially those who are closest to me... It's like a routine,
without intentionally, my words are always mix with sharp
bones, and they get offensive. I'm deeply sorry about this.

Well, to those pass-by-er, suck it up! If I offended you,
I don't really care. Because you are nobody to me...

Anyway, the ulti-most-hardest is to change myself.
I swore to drop all of these habits. I want to grow mentally.
Once, there was a great man tell me to be calmed and listen
to people around me. I should start with this...

Personal experience told me, silence is a piece of gold.

But why am I writing this again? I don't know.. Maybe I just
wanted to update my blog... I will do better, you know.
Less about me and more about the stories in AIMST.

Monday, October 25, 2010

第一科

Mid term 考完了,接著就是要煩拿到的成績。總是滿心期待會有什麼特別的突破之類,但是我知道這是不可能。所以,僅僅要求成績出來會是彌補我付出的努力,就很高興了。今天知道了第一科的成績了,非常的不理想。苦苦支撐地疲乏的心就一下子垮了下來,滿腦子就是想到自己是多麼的無能。

一直在想,是我不夠熱忱嗎?還是我不夠努力?我知道如果十分的努力不行,就代表還要再付出十二分的努力。可是我已經將娛樂的時間減到少之又少,我還能騰出多二分的努力嗎?累了……想要就此停住腳步。只是一個midterm,我都無法好好地表現,加上還是十分之努力。Final我還熬得過去嗎?不敢想。

看到了成績,覺得好累好累。躺在床上睡覺,好讓自己有短暫的時間逃離現實。天也不讓我好過,在床上想的都是成績……成績……成績。不時地自問,你就到這裡了嗎?這就是你的程度了嗎?挫敗感還真是可怖的,朋友依然嘴上說,能及格就不錯了。心裡不禁藐視這種態度,難道我就是為了及格才付出十分的努力嗎?難道我是因為不及格而懊惱,挫敗嗎?不是!所以什麼及格就足夠了的話,我實在很難接受。

嘴上老是掛著我能一個人生存的言論,為了就是讓人以為我可以很強。的確,獨自一個人要生存是容易的;但是沒個了解的人在身邊還會快樂確實是困難的。想太多是我的缺點嗎?想太多讓太多太多的問題變得綿綿不絕,一波又一波地襲來。人會變得消沉,是真的。看著我寫的東西,都是垃圾,盡是意志消沉的垃圾。

世界沒變,依然是殘忍又多姿,好壞盡有。變的是我,是我變懦弱了,也或者是我善感多愁,將問題看大了。無論我是哪種,我現在就像個窩囊一樣,一步也走不前。難道一個人就不能快樂嗎?就算不能快樂,也讓我有個博克臉,笑容裡可以隱藏傷感;瞇眼裡能收藏眼淚。

聽歌或許是最好的良藥,我知道;隨意播著歌,心卻是將它們拒之於千里之外。所以我現在要的是什麼,我也不知道。

All is Well... All is Well……希望這個能安撫我這麼一刻也好。

重新開始

考完試,旅完遊。
再也沒有什麼藉口不寫部落格了。
真的很希望可以這樣持續下去。
腦子裡有太多太多的東西;
其實還是自己也很想寫。

這些事都不用強求,時間對了就
會是一篇文章。

上個星期,同學之間有了個去
浮羅交怡島的遊玩的念頭。所有的事
都是這麼地順利,想著應該沒什麼問題吧。
最終卻是說要辦的同學自己打退堂鼓,
覺得很沒癮,也覺得他們很沒責任。
就在離行的前一天,老師說要在下個星期一
考試,更是讓剩下的人卻步,或許也是
一個讓他們打退堂鼓的的藉口吧。
讓這個已經半死的計劃再受打擊。

但是決定了要去,就決不卻步。
剩下的五個人還是往浮羅交怡島直衝。
剛到那裡,還真是普通;當安頓好之後,
就發現那裡其實很放鬆。
酒、煙、巧克力都是便宜到極點。
基本上,我都是玩、看、休、吃、喝、吸。
什麼問題都突然不再是問題。

若問我到了那裡,還有去什麼其他的地方
留下我的腳步,答案是沒有。由於
資金有限,加上只是要休息。到的地方都是
Hot Spot 的附近,即使如此卻還是很快活。

當然皮包也破洞了,有點窮途末路了。
所以這次也是最後一次了,讓我再累積
了一點點錢,再決定還要去那裡玩吧。

話說回來,在過45分鐘就要考試了。
我卻還再這裡寫部落格,不管了,
既來之,則安之。All is well...

Sunday, October 24, 2010

李開復-如果你已經20歲了,你真的輸不起了…

這篇文章是一把刀。
看得人心疼,看得人心痛。

如果你已經過了20歲但還不到25歲的話,你必須找到除了愛情之外,能夠使你用雙腳堅強站在大地上的東西。
你要找到謀生的方式,現在考慮不晚了。

我從來不以為學歷有什麼重要,天才都不是科班。
但,不是科班,連龍套都跑不了。

你必須把那些浮如飄絮的思緒,漸漸轉化為清晰的思路和簡單的文字。
華麗和漂浮都不易長久。
你要知道,給予文字閱讀快感不夠的,內容,思想,境界,靈魂,精神和智慧,這些才重要。

不要多看那些和你一個路數的女作家的文字。
不要瑣碎,無病呻吟。
不要想到什麼就寫。
不要流連於小感傷和小感動。

我要你相信溫暖,美好,信任,尊嚴,堅強這些老掉牙的字眼。
我不要你頹廢,空虛,迷茫,糟踐自己,傷害別人。
我不要你把自己處理得一團糟。
節制自己的感情並且珍惜它,明白這種感情不是任何人都能要。

千萬不要認同那些偽裝的酷和另類。
他們是無事可做的人找出來放任自己無事可做的藉口,真正的酷是在內心。
你要有強大的內心。

要有任憑時間流逝,不會磨折和屈服的信念。
不是因為在學校的象牙塔中,才說出我愛世界這樣的話,
是知道外面的黑、髒、醜陋之後,還要說出這樣的話。

好好去愛,去生活。
青春如此短暫,不要歎老。
偶爾可以停下來休息,但是別蹲下來張望。

走了一條路的時候,記得別回頭看。
時不時問問自己,自己在幹嘛?
傷心和委屈的時候,要嚎啕大哭。
哭完洗完臉,拍拍自己的臉,擠出一個微笑給自己看。
不要揉,否則第二天早上會眼睛腫。

給自己一個遠大的前程和目標。
記得常常仰望天空,記住仰望天空的時候也看看腳下。

任何時候,任何人問你,有過多少次戀愛,答案是兩次。
一次是他愛我,我不愛他。一次是我愛他,他不愛我。
好的愛情永遠在下一次,別給同一個人兩次傷害你的機會。

不要與浪子,文藝青年交往,別和沒心沒肺的人在一起,別和沒有正當職業混日子的人在一起。
別把犯賤當真愛。一個人作踐自己來取悅你的時候,千萬不要因此感動。
一個男人的煙頭燙在他身上,下一個就可能燙在你身上。
同樣的,當這個女人的刀片割斷她的手腕,下次就可能割斷你的。

千萬別相信一個不準備將你介紹給他的朋友圈子的男人。
一個女人只肯喊你「寶貝」的時候,堅持要她喊你的名字,因為你是男人。
一個男人或者女人不再來找你的時候,就不要再去找他或者她。
不要相信在戀愛上用手段的人。分手時不要口出惡言。
吸取教訓,但不要後悔,後悔沒有用。

別去做撕照片,燒信,撕日記這樣一類三流愛情電視劇中才有人幹的事。
相信愛情。相信好男人和好女人還存在,還未婚,還在茫茫人海中尋覓你。
別說「男人(或者女人)沒一個好東西」,這樣使別人誤以為你閱人無數。

愛物質,適當地。永遠知道精神更重要。
比起那些名錶,名牌,時裝,更加美麗的是勤奮而有朝氣的你自己。

如果你20歲以後所花的每一分錢還都是伸手向父母親人要來的,那你的滿身名牌就只能襯托出你的無恥。
別以為穿上名牌你就有品位,要知道如果沒有真正的內涵,騾子配上金鞍也不會變成駿馬。
你還年輕,先不說開始你的事業,開創你的未來,但你已經成年,至少也要讓自己不再成為父母的負擔,讓父母看到20年辛苦養育的希望。

無所事事只會把你變成一個廢物,一個被所有其他人鄙夷的廢物,因為這樣的你是一個不折不扣的寄生蟲。

別以為弄個怪異的髮型,穿上不男不女的衣服,噴上刺鼻的香水,別人就會注重你,要明白那樣招來的眼光就是別人在看一隻與眾不同的猴子。

許多有教養的人對另類的你的反感並不寫在臉上,但這種反感確鑿無疑肯定會給你帶來極其不利的後果。

別瞧不起勞動人民。不要為勞動羞恥。土地不髒,汗味不難聞。
請尊重那些似乎生活狀況不如你,但仍然用自己的雙手誠實勞動養家糊口的人,因為這樣才是尊重自己。
永遠體恤那些生活在底層的人們,因為我們的親人就是在這些人群中。
我們不嬌貴。我們必須能夠自己養活自己,這是你的尊嚴所在。

不要小看一分錢。不妨自己去掙掙看。
做人有時要強悍一點,被欺負的時候,一定要討回來!
但是不要記恨。小人之見,隨他們去好了。
有原則的寬容和憐憫,會使你高貴。

有小心機的女生是可愛的,但別把這種心計用在勾心鬥角上,那樣會很累。
做人不要太高調,高調容易招惹是非。
但也不能太低調,該強悍時則強悍,但切不可咄咄逼人。

被朋友傷害了的時候,別懷疑友情,但提防背叛你的人。
原諒,但並不遺忘。

做人存幾分天真童心,對朋友保持一些俠義之情。
要快樂,要開朗,要堅韌,要溫暖。
這和性格無關。但你要忠誠,勤奮,要真誠的尊重別人,這樣你的人生才不會黑暗。

寬待自己,也寬待別人。當你不會因為小小的不如意小小的事而生氣或難過的時候,你會輕鬆很多。

要原諒這個世界和自己。
要告訴自己,我值得擁有最好的一切。

Saturday, October 2, 2010

難道只能靠自己?

我覺得很煩很煩耶……
怎麼辦好?也只有你看到而已,
當然也就是寫給你看的咯。

很多很多的事我想跟你分享,想知道你
有什麼想法,卻因為我們根本沒什麼機會
聊,等到真的遇見時卻因看到你,
反而都忘了不開心的事。聽起來是
很不錯的說,因為你讓我忘記了
不好的事。但是暫被忘卻的問題
並不代表已經離開,等到全部問題
又再跑出來的時候,你卻不在了。

為什麼我就不能再更平凡一點呢?
就做個只會為了功課而煩惱的小小人類,
不是很好嗎?果然要找到我的平衡點是很難的。
但是問我的平衡點是什麼時,卻讓我
迷失了方向,因為我自己也不清楚我所
追求的平衡點到底在哪裡、是什麼?

很煩很煩……看似很多人可以分享。
卻是越來越煩,而且讓我覺得問題,
除了自己以外,是沒有人可以幫到自己的。
若是如此,那人又為什麼要有朋友?

深夜裡寫部落格,還真的是語無倫次。

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

信任

有時讓我不由自主地在想
信任真的有那麼難嗎?就在不久
前發現了A(B的前男友兼我好友)
暗地裡是這麼的不信任我。

即使我曾經追求的B已不是他的女友。
即使A再如何的大男人。
即使A多懷疑我會再做出他不想看到
的事,我都不覺得你有問題。

如果是好朋友,我就真的是怪不下。
就算別人跟我說你多不好,我都是
睜一隻眼閉一隻眼,你的一個好都
足已蓋過所有的缺陷。

當我知道你暗地裡“調查”我是否有
跟B在一起,我都覺得沒什麼大不了。
就因為你是我好朋友、你大男人、
你怕輸。我都可以不計較……

但是讓我放不下的是,指責我背叛
你對我的信義;卻同樣地背叛了我對你
的信義。雖然只是一個謊言,但是夠了,
我知道我們之間還真是什麼信任都沒有。
我有我的生活方式,我不再為你想,
你好自為之吧……要怪就怪你背棄了
我對你的信義,怪我自命清高。

很諷刺……突然我覺得原來我們之間的
信任就連一根手指撥弄也足以摧毀之。
讓我在想,我們還是不是朋友。
很感謝你這麼地不信任我又當著我的
面跟我稱兄道弟,讓我明白了信任出了問題
時,是怎樣都看不出,還要別人來HINT我。

你想要什麼?

躺在床上……問我的不是我媽。
也不是我爸,不是我的兄弟,更
不是我的死黨。是它……那個住在
我頭上的老兄。

我真的不知道我要什麼也。
錢吧……有錢的話,現在的什麼
問題都解決了。有錢也可以泡妞……

老實說,問我一百次,我就有一百個
不同的答案。因為我沒想過我要什麼,
不是什麼都不缺,是因為想要跟
可以有是不同的。想了也是浪費我的力氣也。

不過錢真的是很有用哦……可能最想
要錢吧。要買什麼都有得買。雖說
不是每個女生都愛錢,但拿著錢還怕
沒人要靠近你哦?聽得多了,這個假設
還算成立的,現在嘛,有樣子也不代表有人
要你,不過有錢就不同了。女生都愛往
這邊靠,因為有酒喝。

可是它又說錢我是一定沒有的啦!
只能要別的啦!那樣哦……給我樣子啦~
“不是說樣子泡妞沒用嗎?”
哈哈哈哈!有錢人家找你,有樣子就
當然是去找人咯……我在想隨便找個
有錢婆,將她的錢騙光,那不就是我有錢了咯?
哈哈哈!欸!我真的很聰明咧!

“樣子你也是沒有的啦!生給你就是這樣了。”
那樣哦……給我音樂才能吧!!!!我要會
唱歌、彈樂器,像力宏一樣。哈哈哈哈!唱歌
把妹,還真的是絕!手到擒來。

“怎麼又是些不可能的東西?你就沒別
的東西想要了嗎?來來去去都是把妹、
泡妞的,煩不煩哦?”
那樣哦……確實是有的。就是沒妹把
才會盡想把妹的事嘛。不過現在嘛,倒希望
我愛過的人能幸福(這算的過去了吧?)。

“這真的是你想要的?”
再問就翻臉了!


……

.

Friday, August 6, 2010

環境或天生

人的一生有多少個十年呢?
對我來說其實不是很重要,只要
不是白頭人送黑頭人,我都不是
很在乎有多少個十年。
至少我擁有蠻不錯的兩個十年。

我說過一個人到大學以前最好都是以
普通市區為據點最好,至少在能
正式思考什麼是正確待人接受比較簡單
又不險惡的不正統教學。

卻有人跟我說人心險惡與生長
的環境沒有多大的干係。既然她
這麼說我也不多說什麼,每個人有
自己的見地,而且無可否認的就是
有人天生就是領導、追隨、奸詐、
老實、自私、偉大。

先天的不足是可以彌補與更改的。
若非如此,這世上還真是奉了基督
的說詞,人都有罪。

或許人生下來就會有不好的因素,
不代表你就要帶著不好的因素過
一生。人是可以改變命運的,不好的
因素被給予了不是要你帶著它活下去,
而是去除再用好的填入。

Thursday, August 5, 2010

吉隆坡遊

從來計劃都是不能按常理出牌。
不過也算啦,因為不是單方面就能
解決的因素。

下到吉隆坡,我就找來YS,很好地
幫我出完所有餐費,就算我嚷著不可以
他也不讓,還說下次等他回太平的時候
就是我請。既然那麼說了,我也不能做什麼咯。

在他家的第一天上最難熬的,
陪他去武術練習,但我覺得很悶。
不過也沒什麼……就醬就度過了5小時,
(是很難地度過)然後才有晚餐吃~
可憐……

然後第二天就是睡覺睡覺睡覺。
不過還是想獻上億萬分的謝意,我知道你
很努力想要彌補你所“欠”我的。不過
我也沒怪你什麼,就說重了,詞語用重
了點,有怪莫怪。

然後從cyber轉站到puchong。
這段期間有了最不正常的生活,三餐
變一餐,4小時之內兩輪快餐,兩輪桌球。
兩天內5次快餐,進賭場,做夜貓子,
瘋狂練習吞吐之術(如果那算瘋狂),
連續41小時不關機(有點精神崩潰),睡眠
從不超過6小時。

雖說不正常,但卻覺得很充實。
只要有HH在,再怎麼悶都會讓我
看到好玩的一面。It doesn't matter
what I've done, it only matters what I had.
What you think of it might be stone, but
it might be gold for me.

同時也感到很慶幸我想毒說不。
雖然不是什麼很光榮的事,對我來說
卻是很不錯了,曾經想要試已經是很
壞的開始了,還好在最後關頭知道了
給自己開始就是掉入懸崖,亦感謝
YS在暗地裡死命地希望我不要碰。
安啦!!我有分寸!=P

接下來的日子就是到表姐家中,
認識了伊朗籍朋友,Bob。覺得英文進步咯,
因為有個人對我說英文。很想念他
搞笑風趣的樣子,跟豆豆先生很像。

一個星期的離家玩夠了,也想回家。
不久就在太平了,又再繼續窩囊。哈哈哈哈!

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Hookah

昨天真的是太自在了!除了要幫
老媽做點麻煩事之外,整天都是超
有趣的。跟著誠回母校,去找老師。
可還真的衰斃了,踩到不知名的糞便。

等發現時已經在老師的辦公室裡了。
快快地衝向廁所,往水龍頭留出來的
水猛踩猛擦。好像有只踩不死的螞蟻
一樣,連吃奶的力都用上了,可惜成果
還是不好。過後就載著我到了義山,說
想看他朋友的碑,由於時間不當只有
打道回府。

說是回府嘛……也不全然。
去了購物中心,走著就走到了戲院,
看著海報,決定了要買什麼票。
滑稽的是買的是情侶位,笑死我了。
雖然這也不是第一次了,可還是會覺得
這很白痴也。三點半時去麥記叫了set meal。
整張桌子是一片狼藉啦。太陽可是高高掛著的!
誠卻要坐外頭。

“你不是說很熱的咩?”

“沒有啦……突然想坐外面嗎。而且我從來沒有想過
要坐裡面。”

邊吃邊等阿酷來,來到一場,三個人又扮起煙槍來。
就匆匆地幹著去看戲。回到家也是晚餐時間了。

待續……

Thank You

Maybe I'm no longer fit to be
your boyfriend anymore. "Why would
You think so?" or "Is that what you thought
who I am?" I know these are what you
going to say to me. Seriously, yes! These are
what I thought and I had in mind...

For days... I kept on surfing every possibility.
And I realized, I have all the possibility.
But without you, I can't be sure. So many
unknowns there.

And I realized, you just gave me a lesson.
Thank you.... =)

Monday, July 19, 2010

簡單又複雜

誠來找我,可是卻因為在外婆
家結果來不及找他,只有等到今天
早上。等他來載我都快十一點了,
早餐也要變成午餐了。可是依然未減
我的興致。跟他出去從來不需要太多的
語法,只是笑笑,想到一些小事也可以
開懷笑一餐。不會太成熟,而是“天真”
地什麼都覺得很滑稽。

不知覺的想:“怎麼這麼單白?”可是依然是
很有味道。我都不說我的問題,倒是他
每次總跟我說起他的事,然後我再給予
回應。這種比較單方面的對話,我確實
很享受。我也會說些很白痴的東西,好
不好笑也只有他才知道。

我跟他從來只是好朋友,可是感覺卻勝
過好朋友。這種有點簡單又有點複雜的
友誼,我有時也摸不著頭。沒見面時
互不關心,可能用得有點不恰當,不過就是不
見面都不會說話的。上網從來都不說話,
有的也只是必須從對方知道一些事。

或許我們不常聚在一起,難免會有一點點的
代溝,可是見面了還是像以前一樣,什麼
都說,什麼都笑。

套句朋友的話,好朋友怎樣都是好朋友
就算話題少了,好朋友從來不會被降職的。

猶如我剛認識他不久時就知道了,我們
的友誼就是到死了也持續下去。

Friday, July 16, 2010

那邊很高可是卻很大

今天突然想起以前一班朋友
在客廳裡閒聊時的廢話。

剛搬到那裡住的時候,還真的
是滿腦子在想要怎麼適應新的
環境,畢竟長期重複著一樣的
生活了幾年,突然要要異地,
難免會不習慣。

還好不稍多久,很快地就融入
了他們的圈子。有一天,一班
朋友就做在客廳,仗著打腫都不
紅的臉皮,口沫橫飛地說個不停。

尤其是到生理的話題更是聊得
起勁。不禁覺得,這兩個女的
怎麼這麼白目啊?

突然就聊起拳頭就是心臟的尺寸、
腳板就是前臂的長度、中指就是
哪裡的長度之類的。

突然就扯到鼻子來了。其中,甲女
衝著我說,“欸你的鼻子蠻高。”

我“哪有?只是現在比較高一點罷了。
我的鼻子以前跟你一樣扁也!”

甲女趕緊遮住鼻子

我“你的鼻子,永遠就是醬扁的咯。”

甲女“ㄆ一ㄚ你啊。你的鼻翼也很寬。”

接著甲乙女就竊竊私語,然後又傻傻地
自講自笑,就知道他們牽扯到怪話題。
我趕緊指著另一個朋友說“ㄋㄛ!阿天的
也是很大啊!”

結果這個鼻翼的話題就不了了之了。

All about one movie

Is it that simple? I've been trapped
in the past for months... When I decided to
let go.. It just goes away... It's like as it never
happened...

It's all because of one movie...
It sounds ridiculous, but it's true...
I just felt like I've understood the message
in the movie...

And then the rest are so easy to deal with...

Thursday, July 15, 2010

DreaM

During this whole holiday, I was
hoping that I can recall I'd dreamed.
But most of the time, I fail. Only lately,
I'm able to recall some of them...

I always forget to switch my alarm
off before I went to sleep. Earlier, one
of the characters in my dream told me
"Alarm is going to set off... " and then I
heard my watch... Damn.. Then I was
pulled out from my dream.

Why do I love to dream? Because dream is
the only way to fulfill my fantasy...
According to most of my friends, their dreams
are all about reality. Which it is kinda bored for
me... Because I'm already had enough of reality
experience per day.

And the interesting part is that, I always dreamed
about something that is not gonna happen
around us... So, I call it a fantasy.
But, I do kinda envy one of my friends..
She said she can undo what's not right.
Which means she can jump back to where
she started and make a different choices.

If I can do that.. Hmm... I'm gonna be dreaMaster
already. Still I enjoy...

Perhaps, I'm still not grown or I'm sick of
reality? Who knows?

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Track Down

I once tracked down your
blog... It's not really hard. But
I would never know you will
have another mirror is yourselves.

I've no idea how long it took for me
to track you down, but I did.
Now I'm wondering, will you able
to track me down too? If you do...
Maybe you know what should you do.
Hahaha...!

This is funny... Suddenly the existence
of this blog in others mind become so
important already... Maybe I want something
else... Like I listened
"We all want something else
We all want something we can't have"

p/s: it's kinda hard to track your blog... Damn... do you now how hard is it to spell your blog link out? Orz

Back on track

I once fallen.
I thought I could not be blessed.
I thought I am dead on the inside.

But it is not... I really know
I should move on. You hinted me
for such a long time, and only now I
really realize it's been there. But I
was blindfold...

I know I deserve a fresh start.
I felt like reborn, new flesh, new blood...
I know deep down in me, I was still
crawling for it... But today, this day it is...
the 15th of July, I finally stand up and take
the big first step.

This rehab might be melodramatically.
But, it's real. And I'm sober...

I know some of you were really wanted to
help, I appreciate it, you know? I was stubborn
and not being to let go... Now, actually the thing
which just saved me, was a movie...